.
| Hearsay: |
On gender-coding and books. Again with the tools designed to save people from actually parenting. Though I suppose this is a step in the right direction, especially if it sparks conversations. Ninja Boy took ballet, but brutally decapitates his Lego men and refers to me as “General” (forcing me to call him “soldier”). This causes some problems in a Quaker family, but what can you do? I’ll tell you what. CONTEXTUALIZE it. Spend the occasional moment noting how ridiculous it all is and then let them make their choices. Book recs follow article.
It all started with my son, Will, stamping his feet and saying he didn’t want any girls invited to his sixth birthday party. Girls, he declared, are boring. At the same time I noticed my daughter, Vera, who is three, carrying a handbag and lip gloss. Will was demanding his first football kit, Vera was swooning over princess paraphernalia, and I suddenly realised that it was time for a gender stereotyping intervention.
Children know what they are supposed to like from an early age. For girls, it’s princesses, ballet, fairies, parties. For boys, it’s adventure, space travel, fire engines, pirates. Until now, my two have been young enough to do their own thing – Will has enjoyed baking cakes, Vera has pretended to be Luke Skywalker. But the older they get, the harder it is to resist the pink-and-blue divide.
Can books redress the balance?
January 2006
December
2005
November
2005
October
2005
September
2005
August
2005
July
2005
June
2005
May
2005
April
2005
March
2005
February
2005
January
2005
December
2004
November
2004
October
2004
September
2004
August
2004
July
2004
June
2004
May
2004
April
2004
March
2004
February
2004
January
2004
December
2003
November
2003
October
2003
September
2003
August
2003
Bookninja © Copyright
The opinions expressed on this site are those of individual participants
and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the site owners,
organizers, or other participants.
[powered by WordPress.]
December 5th, 2009 at 8:53 am
Never would have thought that there were real gender differences (other than the obvious physical ones) until I had a girl and then a boy. She didn’t get dolls (to her grandmothers’ annoyance), but at three began wrapping a hot water bottle up in a towel and calling it her baby. She played a bit with the Lego she was given early on, but when her brother (born when she was not quite 4) discovered it at 8 months, he played with it constantly. Even learned not to put the blocks in his mouth because they were taken away from him if he did.
And of course he had dolls, but he never played with them until the summer he turned 5 when he had the chicken pox while I was away and his dad played nurse. Then for a week he carried one of his bears around with him, saying he was the “Daddy taking care of his sick baby.”
The moral: It’s quite possible most females are more interested in social interactions than objects, while it’s the reverse for most males. But role models and social context are very important: keep up the good work, George.
PS girls who wanted princess dresses at five won’t wear any kind of dress at 15 these days. Tight jeans and make up is another story.