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| Hearsay: |
McGonagall, reviled in life and death as one of the worst poets ever, is enjoying something of a campy renaissance, and a portfolio of a bunch of broadsides is about to go for a pretty penny. I’d buy that if I had the money. And if poets came over, I’d lovingly take them out and show them as though they were rare Ted Hughes publications–of which I was an exceedingly proud owner–without the betraying slightest hint I was aware of their status in the poetry world. Full of awe, I’d quote passages aloud, letting the final words disappear into a hushed silence of reverent head-nodding.
Oh! Think of the working man when he’s no work to do,
Who’s got a wife and family, perhaps four or two,
And the father searching for work, and no work can be had,
The thought, I’m sure, ’tis enough to drive the poor man mad.Because for his wife and family he must feel,
And perhaps the thought thereof will cause him to steal
Bread for his family, that are starving at home,
While the thought thereof makes him sigh heavily and groan.Alas! The pangs of hunger are very hard to hide,
And few people can their temper control,
Or become reconciled to their fate,
Especially when they cannot find anything to eat.
“Mmm. Mmm. True dat. Words of wisdom,” I’d say. “Words. Of. Wisdom.” Think of it as the cheapest way to keep poets out of your house.
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May 16th, 2008 at 1:16 pm
Wait. Wait! I’m trying to get the rhyme scheme down here: aa bb cc dd efgh??? I think he shoulda changed the last “eat” to “ate” just to get in a couplet at the end.
Ever read Robert Service to a hip hop beat? Try it. “There are strange things DONE in the midnight SUN (pu-cht pu-cht pu-cht)” I think the same treatment could be given to McGonagall.
May 16th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
everything is better when its said to a hip hop beat.
May 16th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
I love that the line “Who’s got a wife and family, perhaps four or two” suggest that the working man has perhaps four or two wives and families.
It boggles the mind.
Well, maybe not the mind.
It boggles the stomach.
May 16th, 2008 at 3:05 pm
I’m sorry, but McGonagall has got nothing on Canada’s own James Mcintyre (1827 – 1906) aka. “The Cheese Poet.”
Below are the opening stanzas of an ode he wrote in honour of a giant round of cheese produced by a dairy association in Ontario. (I especially enjoy the forced rhyme with Toronto)
Enjoy!
Sam
……..
James McIntyre
(1827-1906)
“Ode on the Mammoth Cheese
Weighing Over 7,000 Pounds”
We have seen thee, Queen of Cheese,
Lying quietly at your ease,
Gently fanned by evening breeze,
Thy fair form no flies dare seize.
All gaily dressed soon you’ll go
To the great Provincial show,
To be admired by many a beau
In the city of Toronto.
………..
May 16th, 2008 at 3:11 pm
He had me at “Gently fanned…”
May 16th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
Every poet should be required, as a rite of passage, to write at least one poem about a giant cheese wheel.
Just a suggestion.
May 16th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
I wrote a little appreciation of that cheese poem a while back. Click the link if you want to read it.
May 16th, 2008 at 8:05 pm
Wow. Great analysis Zach! Good to see another Cheese Poet fan out there.
May 17th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
Brad – Paul Muldoon says the same thing about slaughtering a pig, but limits the rite of passage to Irish poets. Giant wheel of cheese, pigs…is there something nationalistic about this?
May 18th, 2008 at 10:28 am
My favourite poem about slaughtering a pig isn’t by an Irish poet at all, but by an American. It’s actually a very good poem, and not a all a bad poem, so it’s more than a little off topic for this thread, but since Chris brought it up, I couldn’t resist sharing “Animals Are Passing from our Lives” by Philip Levine. Click on my name to go to the poem.