A rare books dealer who went to Germany with two very rare and valuable Borges short story manuscripts misplaced them on his return trip and thought they might have been stolen by international literary thieves.

As reports of the missing manuscripts played on the radio, Wronoski sorted through his store, half delirious from a lack of sleep. He grabbed a Robert Mapplethorpe photo he had also taken to Germany and noticed a bulge behind the photo in the protective plastic sleeve.

Wronoski reached in and pulled out the two Borges manuscripts. They had been misplaced in the packing in Hamburg.

“Good,” Wronoski recalled saying. “Now I don’t have to kill myself.”

Turns out they were essentially in his pocket. I sympathize. This is so me. I spend 10 minutes each day searching for glasses that are on my head. Once I lost money I remembered taking out of the bank. I panicked, but eventually found it IN MY WALLET. And just forget about finding the car in the mall parking lot. One day I’ll just have to wait until the damn thing closes and then look. I’m sure Lady Ninja could chime in with more, but I’ve filed a court document restricting her from revealing gratuitous incidents of mental ineptitude.